Dearest Sean,

I've finally gotten off my arse and am rockin' the TOOL -- Undertow of course. You know you were the guy who got me into them. Skipping class, cruisin' in the blazer, and singing about shit blood and cum... you made me see the beauty in all of that - probably too much so .

You and the blazer taught me lots of things...

• You can't tow an Olds with a garden hose
• Hookahs aren't meant for smoking coffee grounds
• Madonna really IS a prophet
  
• Seagulls are impossible to kill
• God exists in an 8 oz Sunny Delight bottle

So thanks for the education bud, who knows where I'd be today if not initiated into such esoterica. We always did do the coolest stuff together, though...even outside the truck. From the day you were the new guy walking into my math class, and the only seat open was next to me. God, too bad for you huh? I dug you immediately, your funny hair and goofy accent (all FIBness aside). I think within the week you pretty much became the most popular guy at school. There was McD's, ....experimenting with the effects of hot fry grease on Mac sauce and happy meal toys, or sitting out in your yard massaging our feet trying to find the pressure point that would induce spontaneous orgasm. Anything to cozy up to the ladies, right? You were always such a damn ladies man. You didn't smoke, but you always carried a lighter around in case of a damsel in distress. And when that wouldn't work, you bought an amulet and tried to hypnotize them. LOL, I remember sitting in my folk's house taking eachother to our secret "doors" - and when that got tired, we just deprived ourselves of oxygen instead.

Maynard is almost done now - bitchin' about the crying carrots, so I guess I'm almost done too. I do want to apologize for not playing the piano part to Epic, but next time I see ya I promise I will. Oh, and I miss you, we all do. Rock In Peace, babe.